For a long time, I thought humility meant beating myself down.

I thought it was about making sure I never felt too good about anything, constantly reminding myself how unworthy, broken, and incapable I was. It felt spiritual. It felt holy. But deep down, it just left me exhausted and insecure, stuck in a cycle of self-loathing that I mistook for godliness.

But that was never real humility.

Real humility isn’t self-hatred. It’s not about walking around with my head down, afraid to own the identity God gave me. It’s not self-pity masquerading as holiness. Real humility is simply agreeing with God about who He is and who I am in Him. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Mindset of Humility

Humility starts with our mindset.

It’s about coming into agreement with God. This brings a shift in perspective where I stop seeing myself, God, and others through my own broken lens and start seeing through God’s.

And this agreement has to be holistic—taking into account the overall picture presented in the Bible.

Biblically speaking:

• I am nothing apart from God. But in Him, I am something—a son.
• God wants me to be honest about my own weakness and vulnerability. But in that place, He gives me strength.
• Apart from Him, I’m sinful. But in Him, I am chosen, beloved, called, set apart. Not because I earned it, but because He decided it.

Real humility isn’t false modesty or wallowing in inadequacy.

It means that I simply believe Him. That’s it.

If He says I have a purpose, then I do. If He calls me to step out, I don’t argue about my shortcomings—I obey. (Though to be real, I’ll be very honest with how I feel so that He can strengthen me).

Because humility isn’t about thinking less of myself; it’s about thinking rightly about myself in relation to Jesus.

A Bible character named Moses had to learn this the hard way.

You see, God called him to deliver a people called Israel. His first response wasn’t faith…. it was insecurity. When God called him He said to God: “Who am I to do this?”

And God’s answer was simple: “I will be with you.” In other words, You’re asking the wrong question, Moses. It was never about who you are. It’s about who I AM and you change because of Me, you’re no longer the same person.

So, I encourage you to come into agreement with God’s word about you and seek His Holy Spirit to speak specifically in to your life. The more you come into agreement, the more you’ll be able to walk with and experience God.

Heart of Humility

Although humility normally starts with the mind, it’s meant to get down to the core of our being—our heart.

This comes from experiencing God’s manifest presence. This means actually encountering Him and getting to know Him.

The more we see God for who He really is, the less we obsess over ourselves.

True humility isn’t just about knowing the truth… it’s being in awe of it. This means we become so caught up in our love for Jesus that we stop overanalyzing our own worthiness.

Insecurity is just another form of pride. It’s self-focused. It makes everything about me—my fears, my failures, my inadequacy. But humility fixes my gaze on Him. When I’m truly in awe of God, I’m not focused on myself, I’m lost in Him.

When humility gets into your heart, a genuine love for God, people, and yourself grows. This love will begin to motivate you to pursue after the things of God—holiness, wisdom, calling, etc.

Another thing that comes when humility hits your heart, is godly confidence. A strong confidence that comes because you’re know Who you belong to and Who is helping you.

This confidence will keep you from trying to defend, impress or prove yourself to other people because you’re secure in the Father’s approval for you.

Actions of Humility

Once my mind and heart align with God’s truth, the fruit of humility shows up in my actions.

It helps me stop making excuses for why I can’t do what He’s asked me to do. I stop hesitating out of fear of failure. I step out, not because I’m confident in myself, but because I’m confident in Him.

Moses fought God on his calling. He kept bringing up his weaknesses, his lack of eloquence, his fear. And eventually, God got angry. Not because Moses was weak, but because Moses refused to trust the One who called him. His insecurity was actually pride—an unwillingness to believe that God’s word mattered more than his own self-perception.

And yet, in His mercy, God still equipped him, still led him, still taught him true humility through obedience.

Humility looks like trusting God even when we feel inadequate. It looks like stepping into our calling because God called us. It looks like serving others without needing recognition. It looks like living fully convinced that everything good in us is from God. Therefore, there’s nothing to be ashamed of and we can boast about what Jesus is doing in our lives.

Genuine humility allows God to pour His heart into you which will propel you into action.

There’s nothing quite like His overwhelming love. It will motivate you. Trust me, I’ve been experiencing it more and more.

True humility produces love-filled actions.

Essence of Humility

At the core, humility comes from understanding this simple truth: Apart from Him I can’t but with Him I can.

Humility is not self-hatred. It’s full dependence. It’s surrender. It’s obedience. It leads to freedom.

It helps us form a healthy self-love that comes from God’s love. And this love helps us love God and other people.

Are you done trying to be your own source? Are you done with insecurity, fear and hesitation?

If you are, I want to leave you with this encouragement: God’s love is enough to transform everything.

He can give you the confidence, identity, security, purpose and love you need to walk boldly wherever He leads you. He can dismantle every lie that holes you back.

Come out of self-hatred and come into who He made you to be. 1 John 4:8 says:

“There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear, because fear involves punishment. The one who fears has not been perfected in love.”

If you’re ready to step into this, start by asking the Holy Spirit to show you who Jesus really is. The more you see Him, the more you’ll see yourself rightly.

Also, speak this truth over yourself: I am capable because of My Heavenly Father.

Ps. We have resources to help you grow in your relationship with Jesus.